what you could do is share off the dvd drive. then the computer you want to access the drive map the drive
then point the dvd software to mapped drive. might give it a shot
so right click on the dvd drive, clicking sharing and name it whatever you want.
then the computer that doesnt have the dvd drive
go to start run type \\computername\shared name (insert any neccesary login information if your using win2k/winxp)
then load up the software and point it to the mapdrive
edit* i have found this program also
http://www.videolan.org/
some say its a pain tho