Essential relationship advice from the premier ladies-man, ArcticFox (*cough*)
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1. Personality is an afterthought - if it's there, all the better
2. Dating a smoker is better than dating a non-smoker - it means they can live there life even with extra weekly expenditures
3. The size of their car reflects how they feel about themselves - the bigger the vehicle, the fatter the ego (no offense, Hummer-drivers)
4. Think twice about dating someone if you have seen them in more than one "home video" - you may find yourself with a second career
5. Don't marry someone with different interests - you wouldn't want to expand your horizons
6. When you search her computer for DVD rips and you find that her firewall is turned off and the system is unprotected, take notice and don't bother buying condoms as she wants to have babies...right now
7. If you date someone that frequently calls in the middle of the night and you suspect they are an insomniac - return the favour by calling them during the day
8. Need someone just so you can make fun of them? Date the one with 4 remote controls on their couch - you should have an easier time pushing their buttons
9. Ditch her if she won't tell you where she works - her real title is Cheif Executive Officer for CIA Internal Operations, and she's out to get you, just like everyone else
10. Don't worry if your date is a work-aholic - it just means more cash to pay for your Everquest addiction
11. And finally, be wary of people that own Macs - they're boring, hard to get along with, and you can see right through them
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