ALCOHOL WARNINGS
The FDA is considering additional warnings on beer and alcohol
bottles, such as:
13. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you are
whispering when you are not.
12. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing
like an a$$hole.
11. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same
boring story over and over again until your friends want to SMASH YOUR
HEAD IN.
10. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay shings
like thish.
9. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe
ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at 4 in the
morning.
8. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what
the hell happened to your pants.
7. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in
the morning and see something really scary (whose species and or name
you can't remember).
6. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of
inexplicable rug burns on the forehead.
5. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that
you are tougher, handsomer and smarter than some really, really big guy
named Bubba.
4. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are
invisible.
3. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people
are laughing WITH you.
2. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause an influx in the
time-space continuum, whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of time
may seem to literally disappear.
1. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may actually CAUSE pregnancy.
actually only one good warning don't drink and drive hope everyone has a good turkey day
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