How do you handle stress?

You know the bad stress or pain, the junk you stuff cause you don't really want to talk to someone about it?

I've been pretty upset a couple weeks now. My son chose drugs and alcohol over living sober. He's out there somewhere and after breaking into his dads house through a locked window a 2nd time yesterday to steal what he wanted and destroy the locked freezer the liquor was in and his dads change (probably about 15 bucks but still...)his dad called police and pressed charges with my support.
I have given up on being able to help him, he's on his own now. I've given up as being a scapegoat as though it's somehow my fault he's a cold hearted liar and a thief at this point in his life.
I've let go and just pray that God will put the pain and wisdom in his path soon before it's too late and he gets 10 years for armed robbery(unless that is the lesson he needs) or dies from an overdose. (no one ever needs that lesson)

Then there are all the other things that come along like bombs...

I should have known I wasn't covering well when I started crying talking to the dentist a couple days ago. Or that just typing this is making water squirt out my eyes without my concent...

But what do you do to handle things when having the appropriate attitude and expectations doesn't work as well as it you'd like it to work?

Let go and let God. I know and I have, but geeze it's tough.

[Warthog]

I gave up thinking I know wtf I'm doing...lol, I just admit to God that I really don't know what I'm supposed to do and I tell Him that I trust that He'll do the right thing - just because I see things one way and then an obstacle gets in the way, doesn't mean that really isn't the best way for it to happen...it usually is (ehh kinda confusing). Everything happens for a reason. I'm a firm believer in THAT one now due to recent experiences....I leave it all to Him.

As far as myself goes, I know that worse things can always happen, lol there have been times where I'm like, not much can make this situation worse but I overcome and adapt to drive on and continue my mission whatever it may be.

That's horrible about your son :-/...I know you've been struggling with him for years. Whatever you do, don't blame yourself...leave it up to God, he'll be ok.

Warthog

[Germ]

I'm so sorry you're having to go through this. I write. That's generally how I handle stress and bad times. Maybe odd, but it works for me.

I know it's really tough, but you have the main ingredient...........let God. I'll be praying for you and your son. I understand what it's like to have everything come crashing down around you.

Stephen

[Martoch]

Originally posted by surreal

But what do you do to handle things when having the appropriate attitude and expectations doesn't work as well as it you'd like it to work?

Go for a long run or hit the gym! Nothing like a good workout to clear your mind and relieve the stress that is so heavily weighing you down.


Of course, you will be in my thoughts and prayers as well...

[Pexster]

You might try going to an Al-Anon (look up AA in the phone book) meeting. They provide support and education for those dealing with addicted family members and/or loved ones. It might help to talk to others who are going through or have been through similar troubled times.

My heart goes out to you in this time of pain. Hang in there.

[RayH]

The hardest part of tough love is that it is also tough on us! There are no short cuts. It's all step by step.

Your son is a menace to himself. He's a menace to society. But most of all, he's in a state of convoluted logic. Now we understand the story of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.

Unfortunately, he's got to hit bottom. Some are lucky and get a relatively high bottom. Some never find out that the bottom doesn't stop until the last breath.

But you are Never Alone. Sometimes you just have to learn to be a square peg in a round hole!

[nunyadam]

Originally posted by Warthog
I gave up thinking I know wtf I'm doing...lol, I just admit to God that I really don't know what I'm supposed to do and I tell Him that I trust that He'll do the right thing - just because I see things one way and then an obstacle gets in the way, doesn't mean that really isn't the best way for it to happen...it usually is (ehh kinda confusing). Everything happens for a reason. I'm a firm believer in THAT one now due to recent experiences....I leave it all to Him.

As far as myself goes, I know that worse things can always happen, lol there have been times where I'm like, not much can make this situation worse but I overcome and adapt to drive on and continue my mission whatever it may be.

That's horrible about your son :-/...I know you've been struggling with him for years. Whatever you do, don't blame yourself...leave it up to God, he'll be ok.

Warthog

That's pretty close to the way I feel.

You have to remember to change what you can, and let the rest go. thats the great thing about prayer is getting it out of your system. Like having a friend you can tell anything too, you can tell them anything without them ever using it against you. (dang few of those around and glad I have one!)


nunya

What Me worry?

Alfred E. Neuman.

[tmx468]

My usual outlets to begin with are hitting the wall, or the bottle. Escapism is my form of initial response.

But talking to others (or yourself even) can help to sort your feelings into something you can deal with.

You can't live friends or relatives lives for them, but when they need you, the most important thing is to be there. Patience is a great virtue.

All the best.

YGPM.

[Angela]

I am so sorry you're going through this!! I have a seventeen year old stepdaughter that I've helped raise since she was two, and I can only imagine how you must be feeling. And of course you're right--this is in no way your fault!

I agree that getting into some sort of group (Al-Anon or something like that) with people who have had to deal with similar problems might be very helpful. The best of everything to you!!

[The Real Bingo]

You could easily become like your son and do drugs and drink the stress off, but be a stronger person. Do something you like to do and forget about the problems for a while if you can. Take a vacation even. Go with sweet to Florida for the week.