Questions and random thoughts

[Brainchild]

Questions and random thoughts
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever the heck comes out!"

Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken
there? I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's butt."

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?

Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

What do you call male ballerinas?

Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream?

If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that
Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a
mouse?

Does the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Why did you try singing the two songs above?

Do illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?

Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your bottom?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks his head out the window?

Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

[John Prophet]

From some website---> "There has been a lot of blindness in my family - my mother, her mother, and her uncle. Because of this, we have associated with blind friends all our lives. I can tell you that they do indeed dream, but quite often their perceptions are quite different from ours.
A good example of this would be a gentleman who used to work for my mother. He was born blind, but at the age of 24 had an operation - a corneal transplant, I believe, and was able to see. His vision wasn't 20/20 by any means - he was still legally blind - but he could see! He told me that the first time he saw a broom, he could not for the life of him figure out what it was. When someone explained to him that it was a broom, he was dumbfounded. He had used a broom nearly everyday of his life, but he had pictured them completely different in his mind, and was shocked by the broom's appearance.

So yes, blind people do dream. And they do "see" things in their minds, even if they don't turn out to actually look like what they've imagined. "

[OuTpaTienT]

Q: How do you describe color to a blind person?

[Brainchild]

That's one of those things that make you say HHHHMMMMM!

[cowboybooter]

Like that Snooker commentator, who once remarked;

"And for those of you watching in Black and White, the Brown ball is the one just behind the Pink! "



CBB

[The Real Bingo]

"Whats the deal with Ovaltine? I mean the jar is round, the glass is round, they should call it Roundtine."

[Germ]

I have a headache now.........

bc, you know i'm gonna lie awake all night thinking.

[Brainchild]

Well at least I have done my job Germ

Roundtine