Question about Engagement / Marriage

[Droppyale]

I've been with my lady for 4 years, and I'm thinking within 1 - 2 years I should be married.

Now.


How does this process work?


you get engaged first... how? you propose give her the ring?


how long is the engagement supposed to be.?


We are both foreigners (she's from Russia / I grew up in Venezuela), each country does things diferently.

Also, are there 2 types of rings? engagement ring and marriage ring?

or what?


I really have no clue about all this, if somebody could please help me.

Thanks

[TheBurningCat]

I'm glad someone asked. All i know is whats in movies!

[tmx468]

Well mate, firstly congrats for meeting someone you wish to spend your life with - enjoy every day of your happiness.

Traditionally, at least in western culture, the following process is followed:

You propose (On one knee if applicable), with a lovely ring.. Gold or Silver (or platinum!!) with a sparkling diamond.

And your engaged.

Fiancé status and engagement can be weeks or years! You can start to make arrangements straight away or after a while for the wedding day (and honeymoon!)

The wedding ring (or rings if you both want one - male preference there), are traditionally gold.

There are no time constraints, or other specific rules... it is your lives, and you do what you are comfortable with.

[Epidemic]

The actual proposal I did was very uncharacteristic of me.

I chose to do it at a fair with several hundred onlookers, I arranged for the dance floor to be cleared and had the Band leader call her to the dance floor.

The ring is supposed to be something on the order of 1 third of your salary for a year. Although personally I think that is silly in allot of ways. Know your girl and what she expects.

I was engaged for 1 year and chose not to go into debt for 20 years on the cost of the wedding.

[Bill in SD, CA]

Some cultures you're supposed to ask for father's blessing. Don't know if that applies here.

By this time you know her tastes. Pick out and buy "engagement/wedding" ring set you think she will like/love. "Love" is better!

Select the right setting for the "popping" of the question. Important to women!

Assuming she says yes, ......... then:

She is in charge of everything else ....... FOREVER!!

Congrats!!!

Bill

[daveleau]

Well, I can only comment on the American way of doing things. I don't know if things will be different based on your cultures.

Usually, the couple gets engaged first. Time of engagement varies from a few months (or even days) to a few years. Usually it is long enough to plan the detailsof the wedding but short enough to appease the wife-to-be's excitement. The guy buys the girl a diamond ring and in some creative, romantic and special way presents it to her and gets down on one knee and asks for her hand in marriage. The engagement ring is supposed to be either 2 or 3 months of your gross salary. The best thing to do is to ask her father if he approves before you ask her, but this is not always practiced. Most people give the engagement diamond and then a wedding ring is given on the day of marriage. The wedding ring is usually a band of gold, silver or platinum that matches the diamond engagement ring, but it doesn't have to be.

There are no hard and fast rules. Just tradition. Some people get married on the spur of the moment with nothing other than a justice of the peace. It is up to you and what you have been brought up doing.

[sixf00t4]

if you know her best friend well enough, have her innocently ask your girl to go out, and stop by a jewelry store. get her to pick out a ring that she likes, and you have to trust her friend not to spill the beans either.

[Droppyale]

Thanks everyone for your help...

Assuming she says yes, ......... then:

She is in charge of everything else ....... FOREVER!!