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Customer Support
If you have ever had to deal with a major corporation's customer service then you will really appreciate this.
My aunt died this past January. Her Bank billed her for February and March for their monthly service charge on her credit card, and then added late fees and interest on the monthly charge. The balance on her charge account had been $0.00... It was now around $60.00.
I placed the following phone call to Her Bank:
Me: "I am calling to tell you that she died in January."
Her Bank: "The account was never closed and the late fees and charges still apply."
Me: "Maybe, you should turn it over to collections..."
Her Bank: "Since it is 2 months past due, it already has been."
Me: "So, what will they do when they find out she is dead?"
Her Bank: "Either report her account to the frauds division, or report her to the credit bureau...maybe both!"
Me: "Do you think God will be mad at her?"
Her Bank: "...excuse me .....?"
Me: "Did you just get what I was telling you... the part about her being dead?"
Her Bank: "Sir, you'll have to speak to my supervisor!"
(Supervisor gets on the phone)
Me: ''I'm calling to tell you, she died in January."
Her Bank: "The account was never closed and the late fees and charges still apply."
Me: "You mean you want to collect from her estate?"
Her Bank: ".....(stammer)" .... "Are you her lawyer?"
Me: "No, I'm her great nephew." (Lawyer info given... )
Her Bank: "Could you fax us a certificate of death?"
Me: "Sure." ( Fax number is given )
( After they get the fax. )
Her Bank: "Our system just isn't setup for death..."
Me: "Oh..."
Her Bank: "I don't know what more I can do to help..."
Me: "Well... if you figure it out, great! If not, you could just keep
billing her...I suppose...don't really think she will care...."
Her Bank: "Well...the late fees and charges do still apply."
Me: "'Would you like her new billing address?"
Her Bank: "That might help."
Me: " ( Odessa Memorial Cemetery #### Hwy 129 and plot number given. )
Her Bank: "Sir, that's a cemetery!"
Me: "What do you do with dead people on your planet?!!"
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SPEEDO
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