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Old 04-13-2003, 07:15 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Baghdad Bob's Top Ten

Haven't seen this before tonight. Apologies if someone has already posted...

Top Ten Things Iraq's Information Minister Has To Say About The War

10. "We're pulling down the statues of Saddam to have them cleaned"

9. "Don't believe that stuff you see on CNN...or NBC, CBS, ABC, Fox or MSNBC"

8. "If you ask me who the winner is, it depends on what your definition of 'is' is"

7. "Iraqi television is off the air because we didn't want you to have to sit through 'Becker'"

6. "Do you know of any job openings for a lying weasel?"

5. "Wolf Blitzer and I are engaged"

4. "Iraqis are in the streets celebrating Cher's 40 fabulous years in show business"

3. "Incoming!"

2. "Saddam's not dead -- he's just out with a case of the shingles"

1. "War? What war?"

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Old 04-14-2003, 04:51 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Very nice, very nice. I personally like #9
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Old 04-14-2003, 04:55 PM   #3 (permalink)
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I believe thats the one from Letterman.
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Old 04-14-2003, 04:58 PM   #4 (permalink)
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My favorite real quote, about Bush and Rumsfeld: "Those only deserve to be hit with shoes."
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Old 04-14-2003, 05:04 PM   #5 (permalink)
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My favorites:

"There are no American infidels in Baghdad. Never!"

"My feelings - as usual - we will slaughter them all"

"Our initial assessment is that they will all die"

"God will roast their stomachs in hell at the hands of Iraqis."

"Be assured. Baghdad is safe, protected"

"We are not afraid of the Americans. Allah has condemned them. They are stupid. They are stupid" (dramatic pause) "and they are condemned."

"We have destroyed 2 tanks, fighter planes, 2 helicopters and their shovels - We have driven them back."

"The authority of the civil defense ... issued a warning to the civilian population not to pick up any of those pencils because they are booby traps," he said, adding that the British and American forces were "immoral mercenaries" and "war criminals" for such behavior.

"I am not talking about the American people and the British people," he said. "I am talking about those mercenaries. ... They have started throwing those pencils, but they are not pencils, they are booby traps to kill the children."

"I triple guarantee you, there are no American soldiers in Baghdad."

Britain "is not worth an old shoe"

Of US troops: "They are most welcome. We will butcher them."

"We will welcome them with bullets and shoes."

"Washington has thrown their soldiers on the fire"

"I speak better English than this villain Bush."
"They're not even [within] 100 miles [of Baghdad]. They are not in any place. They hold no place in Iraq. This is an illusion ... they are
trying to sell to the others an illusion."

"We will kill them all........most of them."

"They are like a snake and we are going to cut it in pieces."

"they are nowhere near the airport ..they are lost in the desert...they can not read a compass...they are retarded."

"Our estimates are that none of them will come out alive unless they surrender to us quickly."

"We made them drink poison last night and Saddam Hussein's soldiers and his great forces gave the Americans a lesson which will not be forgotten by history. Truly."

"We're giving them a real lesson today. Heavy doesn't accurately describe the level of casualties we have inflicted."

"I can say, and I am responsible for what I am saying, that they have started to commit suicide under the walls of Baghdad. We
will encourage them to commit more suicides quickly."

"Their infidels are committing suicide by the hundreds on the gates of Baghdad. Be assured, Baghdad is safe, protected."

"We defeated them yesterday. God willing, I will provide you
with more information. I swear by God, I swear by God, those
who are staying in Washington and London have thrown these
mercenaries in a crematorium."

"Today we slaughtered them in the airport. They are out of Saddam International Airport. The force that was in the airport, this force was destroyed."

"We went into the airport and crushed them, we cleaned the WHOOOLE place out, they were slaughtered"

"Yes, the american troops have advanced further. This will only make it easier for us to defeat them"

"Search for the truth. I tell you things and I always ask you to verify what I say. I told you yesterday that there was an attack and a retreat at Saddam's airport."

"Listen, this explosion does not frighten us any langer. The cruise missiles do not frighten anyone. We are catching them like fish in a river. I mean here that over the past two days we managed to shoot down 196 missiles before they hit their target."

"They fled. The American louts fled. Indeed, concerning the fighting waged by the heroes of the Arab Socialist Baath Party yesterday, one amazing thing really is the cowardice of the American soldiers. we had not anticipated this."

"The forces of American colonialism began to drop containers that produce a sound explosion, a very huge sound. I remind you that they said that their strategy is based on shock and awe. Those failed ones manufactured a type of container that has an explosive substance, which they drop. They cause a very huge explosion in terms of sound, as if the universe was shaken. After a while, you go out and you don't find anything. You find some nails, screws, pieces of metal, but the important thing here is the sound. Those failed ones think that through the huge sound explosion, people would be shocked and consequently would collapse and be defeated. What happened? The contrary. The fighters..., the masses..., and the heroic sons of the Iraqi tribes discovered this game. They will turn it against the American louts so as to shock them. Wait for surprises, God willing, to see how the US game will fail."

"It has been rumored that we have fired scud missiles into Kuwait. I am here now to tell you, we do not have any scud missiles and I don't know why they were fired into Kuwait."

"Tonight, we will do something unconventional against them. This means: not by the military. We will do something that I believe will become a pretty example for those mercenaries. I would not be giving out a secret when I say that action in the dark against such mercenaries is effective, not through the action of armies. I say that dropping down those mercenaries in a surprise fashion at Saddam Airport without accurate calculations is largely meant for showing things. It's a showy operation. It is a kind of surprise muscle flexing to the world to show it that the shock and awe operation is indeed successful. May they be accursed. Through this operation [shock and awe], they sent a number of their villains and mercenaries to be butchered. Again, and according to my early estimates, unless the remaining part of their soldiers surrender, the chance for their survival is very slim. The surprising thing is that after they threw their soldiers into a place where they are not aware of the real results, the villainous Americans, like Powell and the others, sat in Europe to discuss how to divide Iraq as spoils after the war [laughing]. This means what's post-war. The post-war [Iraq] will be the same current Iraq under the leadership of President Saddam Husayn."

"The United Nations....[is] a place for prostitution under the feet of
Americans."

"They are sick in their minds. They say they brought 65 tanks into center of city. I say to you this talk is not true. This is part of their sick mind."

"We have destroyed 50 tanks today. That 5-ohhh tanks" [while holding up his fingers]

"Their forces committed suicide by the hundreds.... The battle is veryfierce and God made us victorious. The fighting continues."

"Yesterday, we slaughtered them and we will continue to slaughter them."

"We're going to drag the drunken junkie nose of Bush through Iraq's desert, him and his follower dog Blair...There are 26 million Saddams in Iraq"

"When we were making the law, when we were writing the literature and the mathematics the grandfathers of Blair and little Bush were scratching around in caves"

"They will come and we will slap them about the head and then kick them on their backsides when they leave"

About Bush and Rumsfeld: "Those only deserve to be hit with shoes."

"Bush is a very stupid man. The American people are not stupid, they are very clever. I can't understand how such clever people came to elect such a stupid president."

"Whenever we attack, they retreat. When we pound them with missiles and heavy artillery, they retreat even deeper. But when we stopped pounding, they pushed to the airport for propaganda purposes.''

"The capital, especially the commandos, are getting ready to wipe them out"

"We are surrounding them and pounding them. The whole trend has changed and we are going to finalize this very soon.''
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Old 04-14-2003, 05:06 PM   #6 (permalink)
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MD did you copy the entire weloveiraqmin....com well you know the site lol
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Old 04-14-2003, 05:28 PM   #7 (permalink)
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no, I went through and found the best ones, only for you guys.
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Old 04-15-2003, 06:25 AM   #8 (permalink)
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"they are nowhere near the airport ..they are lost in the desert...they can not read a compass...they are retarded."


"We're giving them a real lesson today. Heavy doesn't accurately describe the level of casualties we have inflicted." (His first true statement)

"It has been rumored that we have fired scud missiles into Kuwait. I am here now to tell you, we do not have any scud missiles and I don't know why they were fired into Kuwait."


"We're going to drag the drunken junkie nose of Bush through Iraq's desert, him and his follower dog Blair...There are 26 million Saddams in Iraq" (Yea and today they have all been torn down.)


About Bush and Rumsfeld: "Those only deserve to be hit with shoes." (ouch!!! )
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Old 04-15-2003, 06:38 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Get it all here Folks.

We love the Iraqi Information Minister
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Old 04-15-2003, 01:45 PM   #10 (permalink)
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"I blame Al-Jazeera - they are marketing for the Americans!"

I love this guy! - he needs his own show.
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