Favorite funny quote (CLEAN and funny)

[George VII]

My quote of the week -

*friends little brother looking up at my Darth Maul poster* "Oh, that's that Darth fella; he's so nice!!!"

[originel]

"there's an aol client coming out for Linux"

"can you keep my girlfriend here at tech from seeing my girlfriend from back home, she's coming up this weekend" (i kid you not!)

"let's play twister" (ok so it's funny in context with the person that said it)

[M_Six]

"Outside a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside a dog it's too dark to read."

Groucho Marks

[LinuxNewbie]

here are some ones i've heard in my time:
from Ozforums.com
"i formatted my CPU last week"

from Ozforums.com
"when i make my game it says something has to be set to 1 and what do i have to set to 1"

from Ozforums.com
"the was before after i have no clue y i typed that so sorry for my english"

some guy said this one at Ozforums:
"Listen i got my custom maps server working 63.226.132.110:27016 but it needs filling and admins to monitor apply if u wish one peeps constantly come there will no no sniper rifles alouse not sig-600 or what ever it is and no amps there may be knife fights at saturday at 7:00-7:30 and id u dont like that leave then but to let u know other wise its just runned on random now thanks"

some peoples' english astonishes me

[Brainchild]

Groucho while dancing with a lady, "Baby if I get any closer, I'll be standing behind you"

Readers Digest"life is fine lived from the middle, but the view is better from the edge"

Sign @ Work"I've gone out to look for myself, If I should happen top return before I get back, KEEP ME HERE!"

[Warthog]

*edit*
wasn't 'clean'...

Originally posted by LinuxNewbie
here are some ones i've heard in my time:
from Ozforums.com
some peoples' english astonishes me

Whadya figure, it's an Ozzie sighte!

We have politicians who said things like: "Traditionally most of Australia's imports come from overseas."


Cheers
Mick

[LinuxNewbie]

ROFL

are you sure Bush didn't say that?

"i stand by decisions i've made in the past, i stand by decisions i made in the present and i stant by decision i made in the future"
um ok dubbya, you do that

[nunyadam]

The secret to enjoying your job is to have a hobby that is even worse.

calvin of calvin and hobbes

[nunyadam]

Bushisms

I know how hard it is for you to put food on your family.

They want the federal goverment controlling Social Security like it's some kind of federal program.

I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully.

I will have a foreign-handed foreign policy.

The senator has got to understand_ he can't have it both ways. He can't take the high horse and then claim the low road.