My g/f. I need HELP! thanks. - Page 2

caddmannq · 04-02-2002, 12:29 AM

Negotiation is OK, if you can make it non-confrontational. Unfortunately, many women take any suggestion you'll make of a deficiency in the relationship as personal criticism (= instant confrontation.)

Tell her you miss her a lot, but keep your cool. Women brag to each other about either how great or how lousey their B.F.'s are. When her friends are doing this stuff, they may "turn her head." She may become indecisive or unsure of her choices. Perhaps she's at that point of uncertainty.

Just show her that you love her in simple ways, and don't get all weepy about it. If she's worth keeping, she'll come around in time, & without much pressure from you. If not, she's not "the one". Say 'bye. Then start looking elsewhere.

TonTo · 04-02-2002, 08:47 AM

update: ok, she called me this morning. she said, you know you won't see me this weekend, cuz i have to work. i said, yeah, i'm goin home this weekend anyways,(up to my hometown) then she said, you know you won't see me the weekend after that either right? i'm helping dana with the LANparty.

ERG!... ok,

i just want to make sure that i'm not being an insensitive ****** here for wanting to see my g/f once in a while

04-02-2002, 10:51 AM

Hrm, this sounds like me and my G/F reversed. I was spending all my time with my friends on in front of my computer and she was getting upset. Justifiable since I was playing games on her nights off instead of spending time with her. But when she told me how she felt about it I realized I was an idiot and now I spend more time with her on her nights off (we have about the same kind of schedule that you guys do, except she starts 5PM to 1AM next week!!). Then again, I sleep at her place 6 out of 7 nights a week now so she's more amiable about me spending time with my friends.

I guess the point is is that if she realizes that she's doing something you aren't very happy about it and she cares, she'll make an effort to change it. If she doesn't, than best of luck to you holding a mostly one sided relationship together.

And OOC, why can't you help her with Dana and the LAN party? Exclusive company or something???

-Whir

TonTo · 04-02-2002, 10:55 AM

Quote:

And OOC, why can't you help her with Dana and the LAN party? Exclusive company or something???

I could, but, i was flat out told, that, when she's with dana, or the friends in that circle, she's not there to see me, she's there to see them. and, i probalby will go there and help out... it all depends

caddmannq · 04-02-2002, 11:27 AM

Hmm...Doesn't want to include you in her circle of friends?
Do you feel like an appliance?
Unless she's got some incredibly redeeming qualities, I'd be out looking for a new girl.

Mine always wants me to socialize with her friends.

04-02-2002, 11:33 AM

Indeed.

-Whir

TonTo · 04-02-2002, 11:38 AM

erg, it's just really hard, cuz, we do love each other, she' sjust got issues.... hell, she's a freaking subscriber, and, she's cute, fun to be around. idunno..... i figured, i'd give it till the monday after that LAN party.. if things dont' look allot better by then...... i'll have to turn her loose.

04-02-2002, 12:12 PM

Good luck dude. Hope everything turns out for the better.

-Whir

THRUSH · 04-02-2002, 11:12 PM

Here are some more important questions for you:

How long have you been dating?
Had you discussed the nature of your relationship previously, where does that stand (have you stated and demonstrated your level of committment)?

TonTo · 04-03-2002, 12:22 AM

uh, 3 months.
she knows i want a serious relationship, and she says she does too.
i talked with her tonight, and, she just kept goin on about how i hate her relationship with dana, and that i'm jealous of it. i'm not, i'm just asking for a small percentage of the time she spends there.......