Some of these have got to ring a bell with the parents out there.
Amnesia: condition that enables a woman who has gone through labor once the ability to do it again
Feedback: the inevitable result when the baby doesn't appreciate the strained carrots
Defense: what you'd better have aroun de yard if you're going to let de children play outside
Drooling: how teething babies wash their chins
Family Planning: the art of spacing your children the proper distance apart to keep you on the edge of financial disaster
Dumbwaiter: one who asks if the kids would care to order dessert
Hearsay: what toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word
Grandparents: the people who think your children are wonderful even though they're sure you're not raising them right
Impregnable: a woman whose memory of labor is still vivid
Independent: how we want our children to be as long as they do everything we say
Baby: the youngest child in your family, no matter what the age.
Look Out!: what it's too late for your child to do by the time you scream it
Prenatal: when your life was still somewhat your own
Bottle Feeding: an opportunity for Daddy to get up at 2 a.m., too
Puddle: a small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes into it
Show Off: a child who is more talented than yours
Full Name: what you call your child when you're mad at him
Sterilize: what you do to your first baby's pacifier by boiling it and to your last baby's pacifier by blowing on it
Thunderstorm: a chance to see how many family members can fit into one bed
Prepared Childbirth: a contradiction in terms
Storeroom: the distance required between the supermarket aisles so that children in shopping carts can't quite reach anything
Second child syndrome: the fact that the new baby gets less than half of the attention that the first one did
Temper Tantrums: what you should keep to a minimum so as to not upset the children
Top Bunk: where you should never put a child wearing Superman jammies
Two-Minute Warning: when the baby's face turns red and she begins to make those familiar grunting noises
Whodunit: none of the kids that live in your house
Whoops: an exclamation that translates roughly into "get a sponge"
Verbal: able to whine in words
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